It's amazing how when I finally make a commitment in my heart to love everyone, how easily peace flows in. Suddenly, I am unafraid to be myself, to let my heart follow its desires. For so long, I have been afraid that my desires are evil. Now I find that they were really put in my heart to guide me to my best life possible.
Community does not have to be painful. It can simply be the ebb and flow of the tide of love on my heart. There are times to give away when I am so full I could not receive any more. There are times to receive, when I am dry and barren and thirsty for love's embrace. And then there are the between moments, when I am caught in the dance and I don't know who is giving and who is receiving, just that we both are in this moment. This is what love, what family, what community means to me. I open my heart because I am unafraid of being hurt even while I find myself scared at times of what the future may hold.
I have to trust the other and trust myself to know when to give, when to receive, when to dance, and when to walk away or simply wait. But I am finding I can trust myself, and I can trust others. It's just one move at a time. The sea knows. She whispers to me that all these desires will bud into a tree of life. So I watch the tide go out knowing that it's just a matter of time before it comes in again and brings you to me on these shores of hope. I am watching and waiting.
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