Quakerism and Other Oddities

I'm doing a research paper on what it means to be Quaker for my Christian Foundations class at school. Admittedly  I am no Quaker. I was brought up within the Catholic faith for the first five years of my life before switching to a mainstream, conservative church until I was nine. At this point, my family joined Northside Alliance Church, which was an offshoot of the Missionary Alliance denomination before becoming non-denominational sometime in my teens as the church became increasingly charismatic  After graduating from high school, I attended a discipleship school for a year that was Calvinistic at its core, but essentially non-denominational as well. Since returning home from that experience, I have attended a variety of churches. The closest thing I would call to my own home is the House of Prayer movement. I feel like I can blend with almost any Christian environment I find myself in while my faith is best served in individual experience and expression. To those who know nothing of church history and theology, I apologize for how boring this post is thus far.

As I read Rufus Matthew Jones book The Faith and Practices of the Quakers written in 1930 and published by Methuen & Co.LTD. in London, I was surprised by a paragraph I read that deeply touches my own sentiments when it comes to faith. He writes,

In the first place, the Churches are bound to face, in a more adequate way than has yet been done, the intellectual reinterpretation of the universe. Christianity is, of course, vastly more than a theory of the universe. But at the same time, it cannot be right to hamper the freedom of the spiritual life of man by trying to keep it fitted into the intellectual framework of apostolic ages, or dark ages, or middle ages, or the reformation age. What one is asked to believe, or to think, or to hold, must fit in with and conform to one's whole system of thinking. Religious truth must always first of all be truth. It must not be determined by the views which prevailed in religious circles in some particular former century, any more than medical truth, or truth in physics, should be so determined. Every truth that has been discovered, verified and demonstrated, is thereby orthodox. Truth in this sphere and field, as in all other fields, grows, expands and enlarges. It must not be limited to what was in stock in the ages when creeds were formed. It is not enough, then, to debate a change of phrase here and there in an ancient formulation of faith. The person who it to be genuinely religious, who is to be a follower of Christ, must be free to believe what his deepest being finds to be true and he must not be asked to say that he believes what he cannot square with the facts of his universe, or with the testimony of his soul. pps. 4-5

How honest can I be when I am told what to believe, told what is right and wrong, told to face the facts? I loved this passage so much because I don't want easy answers. I don't think those really exist in this life. They don't for me, anyways. If they do for you, I am so pleased. For me, my faith is the ripping of new life, the pulling and messy death and rebirth. Nothing is ever solidified or perfect. I crave order, yet the chaos is where I am most at home. My dreams are born out of that chaos. I dream of a church that can love everyone regardless of where they have been or what their personal beliefs are based alone on the love that I see in Jesus. I believe in the work of the cross; it is my hope and stay. I have friends who do not understand the cross at all or who believe God is a giant fairy in the sky, a made up child's story to help people sleep at night. Very good. I still love them even as I hold dear the most precious relationship I have.

If you ask me how I know God is real, it's because I have heard his voice. It's because things happen in my life too often for it to be coincidence. It's because I always have what I need when I need it, even though there is no logical explanation for the phenomena  I believe in God because I know things I should not about other people. I feel power go out of me when I pray for others. I have seen genuine miracles. I believe in God because when things were craziest in my life, when I cried out to God they became peaceful. I believe in God as surly as I believe in the person who gives me a hug because I have felt their embrace. To deny their existence would be stupid on my behalf and make me a madwoman. In the same way, I have felt God, heard His voice, seen the evidence of His activity in my life, and know Him as intimately as I know my best friends. To me, He's real. And if that makes me a madwoman, so be it.

Yes, I think faith has to change and grow. No, I don't think the earth is flat or deny evolution as a change over time that has been seen in the earth and documented. I just still know there are things in the universe I cannot explain, a mystery to it. This is the art of the world, the creativity and soul of it. I ascribe all of this to a personal God who loves me and cares for me. Should you chose to define it in some other way, my disagreement with that does not mean I hold you in any less regard. I still find you amazing.

This is what I struggle to say. When we talk about faith, so many times hostility makes people turn into monsters and lose sight of the value of each person in front of us, regardless of their belief. I don't have to agree with someone in order to love them. I don't have to subscribe to their belief system or lifestyle to respect them. Disagreement is not licence to devalue another human being. Honest questions should not be met with disdain. Learn from others. Be curious. Do not be threatened just because someone else doesn't see it the way you do. Without the dialog, there can be no growth on either side.

But I may just be a madwoman. Who knows? Perhaps the dialog will heal us all.