AlAnon

We come in all shapes and sizes to a room set with chairs and literature. There are pamphlets and books. We come from all different backgrounds, all walks of life and faiths are represented here. We come with only one commonality. Someone we love has a problem drinking too much alcohol, and we've come to the end of ourselves trying to fix their problem.

It's a curious thing that I can feel kindred with a group of strangers. I don't have to explain to them crying because I can't stop someone from drinking. I don't have to tell them about being disappointed because my plans fell through with a drinker and hear them remark, "Why don't you just stop making plans with them?" Financial crisis, sleepless nights, and hopelessness are all familiar to this group, as is the feeling of being completely out of control. We don't share because we are unfamiliar with these things. We share because we've held them in for too long. We're here because we need to borrow each other's strength in order to find the strength we've always had. We can carry on.

So I have started to go to AlAnon because when I tell my story here, people aren't shocked by it. These people aren't scared by this demon in my past, this thing I can never out run. They are staring it in the face too and living and loving in spite of it. If they can love regardless and learn to accept life on life's terms, I know I can too. They are the embodiment of hope for me. Life can be good no matter what.